Loss of Trust
by Lietuva'sGirl
Summary: The three Baltics are brothers, and for the most part, they get along well. But, occasionally, there are times when they fight, and those moments are vicious and full of hurt. Three shot focused on each Baltics.
1. Lithuania vs Latvia

Hello, my amazing readers! I have a new story for you guys. In this one, each chapter focuses on an argument/betrayal between two of the Baltics. First up, is Lithuania vs. Latvia. Please feel free to leave a review. They never fail to make my day and encourage me to keep writing. I already have Estonia's chapter planned out, but...I NEEDyour guy's help. I have no idea what to write for Lativa! Please, please help me out of this funk, and send me ideas; who should Latvia get angry with and why?

Now, thank you for honoring me by reading, and please enjoy.

Disclaimer: Hetalia does not belong to me.

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"Вы, глупые мальчики! Иди сюда! Теперь!" Russia's roar tore through the house, like a wind on a Siberian plane. Lithuania's head shot up from his tedious work of folding laundry. An icy weight settled in the pit of his stomach. Quickly, he stood up and made his way to the massive foyer, where he knew Russia would be waiting.

As soon as he entered the room, he could practically taste the change in atmosphere. The air was thick and heavy with an impending sense of doom. The massive Slavic nation stood in front of the two younger Baltics. Both stood as if their spine were made from an inflexible rod. Dread sank its claws into Lithuania as he went to join them.

For a moment Russia stared at them, eyes lit with angry fire. Lithuania could hardly see his lips, they were pursed so tight. Any comment he might have made to calm the situation died on his tongue. Whatever crime had been committed was serious, no amount of talk would lessen the anger. Lithuania stood still, waiting for Russia to speak. His chest ached, and he had to repeatedly remind himself not to fidget. A drop of sweat trailed down his neck, but still Russia said nothing. Instead, he merely forced breath out between his clenched teeth. _Oh god,_ Lithuania realized, _he's too angry to speak!_ Lithuania's own breathing picked up speed, and his eyes clouded until all he could see, all he could here, all he could notice was Russia.

Finally, the giant nation gained control over himself. "I come home," he began, "from work. I go and talk to the Tzar. Together, we make sure that life is good, not just for me, and my people, but for you three as well."

"Thank you, Mr. Russia," the three stuttered out together. "Imagine my surprise though, when I come home and find that I have been stolen from!" Lithuania cast a quick glance at his two brothers. Their faces showed nothing but confusion. "Look at me Litva!" Russia snarled and immediately blue eyes were trained back on him.

"Latvia, did someone come in to our house and over power you and your brothers?"

"N-no sir." Latvia whimpered.

"Hmm. Then one of you must have stolen from me." Panic tightened its hold on Lithuania's heart. _No, no, no. This can't be happening. If he thinks one of us stole…what's missing…can we change his mind?_

"Estonia," Russia barked, and said nation stood a little straighter. "Are you not satisfied in my home? Do I not provide you with more than enough food? More than enough clothing? Are you not tucked into a warm bed every night?"

"We have all we need…and more sir."

Russia scrutinized him for a moment longer before resting his eyes on Lithuania.

"Litva, are you angry with me? Are you and your brothers trying to punish me?"

Lithuania shook his head. "No sir. Never sir. We-"

"Silence!" Russia interrupted him. "One of you is lying, because…" from behind his back he pulled an empty vodka bottle. "I found this in my cabinet. And four more of its friends. All empty. Do any of you care to explain how this happened?"

"M-aybe you drank it all and put them back," Latvia suggested meekly. Lithuania swiveled his head to gawk at his youngest brother. _Latvia, h_ e wanted to wail. _Shut up!_ But Latvia was never good at keeping his thoughts in his head. "M-maybe you forgot that you had drank them all. N-not cause you were drunk! N-no. Maybe…it's cause you were so busy. Taking care of us and all."

"Do you think I am stupid, little one?" Russia growled. With eyes widened by fear, Latvia shook his head. "N-no sir!"

"Then why is my vodka missing?" The anger in that one sentence had all three Baltics trembling. _Come on Lietuva. Get control over yourself. Fix this!_

"Mr. Russia," he began tensely. Russia's eyes locked on him. "perhaps…" his voice squeaked so he cleared it and began again. "I think one of us got so wrapped up in cleaning the kitchen, that we didn't notice when we put five empty vodka bottles back in the pantry."

Russia raised an eyebrow. "You, Litva, somehow managed to put five _empty_ vodka bottles back into the cupboard?"

"I thought they were full." Lithuania suggested nervously. "I…I can be very silly like that sometimes." He forced out a weak chuckle. "It won't happen again sir."

"Oh Litva, you are not silly…stupid…that is the right word for you."

Lithuania closed his eyes and bit his lip. "I'm sorry," he murmured.

"You're more stupid than I thought if you think I believe that." He crossed the room in three quick strides and gripped Lithuania's face in his gloved hand, forcing Lithuania's neck back. "What happened to my vodka?"

"I-I don't know sir!" His eyes flashed around and he caught sight of Latvia. The poor boy was shaking, and pale, and he kept mouthing something. _Man žēl Man žēl_ ; I'm sorry.

 _Oh Latvia._ Lithuania wanted to hug his brother, he could just picture what had happened. Latvia had moved all the bottles from their shelves to clean it, when he knocked over a few. Scared, he put them back, hoping Russia would not find them.

 _I wish you would have told me. Estonia and I would have tried to find a way out of this._ Russia saw him looking at Latvia. "Ah, Little Latvia," he said, releasing Lithuania and stalking over to the trembling mess of blond curls and petit body. "Do you have something to tell me?"

"I drank it!" Lithuania blurted out. "It was me, I drank your vodka." Relief shown in Estonia's eyes, and he flashed the eldest a strained smile. Lithuania returned it, and then resumed talking to Russia. "I'm sorry sir." Russia turned back to Lithuania, while Latvia ran to Estonia who pulled him into a protective embrace. They both watched the drama unfolding in front of them.

"You…Litva why?"

"I wanted to know what it tasted like. Poland and I only ever had…" he trailed off for Russia's face grew darker at that name. Nothing good ever came from mentioning Poland.

"If you would have asked me for a sip, I would have given it to you." Russia told him sadly. Lithuania couldn't meet his eyes. "And you drank five whole bottles? Litva, I think after your punishment, you and I will need to address your drinking problem. A tiny nation like you can't hold that much vodka. It's not healthy for you." Lithuania flushed. "I'm sorry," he whispered. _Oh,_ I'm _the one with a drinking problem? Mr. Russia, do you even see how crazy that is? Even if I_ did _drink five bottles, it is practically_ nothing _compared to what you can guzzle down."_

"Why did you lie to me about it?"

Lithuania turned even more read. He hated himself, truly hated himself for what he was about to say, what he was about to make himself look like. "I didn't want you to be mad at me."

Russia smiled sadly at him. "Oh, little one. My little Lithuanian mouse. I would have been mad, da. But I will always forgive you. Now, instead of avoiding my anger, I am angry at you twice! Once for drinking, and two for lying. It would have been much easier if you just confessed, da?"

"I'm sorry."

Russia sighed. "I know you are. But that changes nothing. Come with me to the kitchen." Lithuania obediently followed Russia with leaden legs. As they walked, Lithuania focused on resigning himself to his fate. _Please God, please don't let it be too bad,_ he prayed. _Why does this always happen? Why can't we just discuss things like normal nations? Why does every mishap, accidental and purposeful result in some horrific punishment?_

Lost in thoughts, Lithuania didn't notice when Russia stopped, so he bumped into him. Russia chuckled as Lithuania rubbed his slightly aching nose. "You're so cute Litvuska!" he chirped. Lithuania gave him a hopeful smile. If Russia was in a good mood, maybe the punishment could be avoided? As if sensing his thoughts, Russia's face morphed into a scowl. "No" he mumbled more to himself than the brown-haired servant. "Нет," he said again. "I must be firm. I _must_ be firm." Lithuania deflated, this was not going to be an easy punishment.

"Take your shirt off Litva," Russia commanded. Lithuania complied. Russia watched him as he did so, but his darkened face never changed, even as Lithuania spent several agonizing seconds trying in vain to undo a button with trembling fingers. Finally, he managed to do so. Slipping off the shirt and undershirt, he folded them up neatly.

"Lay on the floor."

Lithuania sank to the floor, hating the cold against his belly. _He's not even telling me good boy! That can't be good._

He jumped when he heard glass shattering next to him. He looked up in time to see Russia hurl another empty vodka glass against the floor. This one shattered too, and Russia picked up another. "Head down, Litva," he barked. "I don't want glass to get in those pretty eyes of yours."

Obediently, Lithuania buried his face in his arms. Every time the sound of breaking glass rung through the kitchen, he flinched. Russia said nothing to comfort him, indicating just how irate he actually was.

In total, Lithuania counted five broken bottles shattering on the floor. Head still hidden, as it would remain until Russia gave him another command, Lithuania felt the presence of his giant master kneel down beside him. A leather glove touched his back, and Lithuania tensed.

"Remember Litva, you brought this on yourself. You deserve what is about to happen to you for lying and stealing, da?"

"D-da."

Russia was silent, and Lithuania waited in agony for his punishment to begin. Fear made his stomach sour, and his chest hurt.

Without warning, a glass shard buried itself in Lithuania's back.

Lithuania breathed through his nose. He would not make a sound at the first cut. A second shard joined the first, going so deep, Lithuania could feel it scraping against his backbone. Another, and another, and another, and another. The cuts kept forming, yet they hurt so much more than he expected. The cycle continued on, more and more cuts forming across his body.

"Mhm!" Lithuania groaned. Russia paused. "Ah, now we're getting somewhere. Remember Litva, I can't tell if you're learning if I can't hear you crying."

Another cut. "Ah-ahh!"

It felt like every inch of his back had been sliced, but still, Russia continued on-and with every cut Lithuania made sure he voiced his pain.

Finally, Russia stopped, and Lithuania lay panting on the floor. "Look at me Litva," Russia whispered. Lithuania did, and Russia thumbed away the few involuntary tears of pain. "They will come out in a week, and then I will forgive you." Grunting, Russia rose to his feet. "Don't forget your chores," he said before leaving.

Lithuania's mind whirled. _Come out in a week? What does that mean?_ He turned around to get a glimpse of his back and was met with an explosion of pain. "Uh-uhnn!" Lithuania whimpered. Deeply embedded in his back where dozens of shards from the broken vodka bottles. _They weren't cuts after all,_ Lithuania realized miserably. He allowed his head to flop back to the floor, before gathering his strength and pushing himself up. He had to swallow down a scream. Every time he moved his back hurt, and several shards had been positioned so they scraped bone. _A week! Mr. Russia's going to leave me like this for a week!_ Despair seeped into the battered nation's body, and Lithuania blinked away the burning tears that flooded his eyes. _Remember why you did it. For Latvia._ Thinking of his little brother, Lithuania realized that both boys were probably very worried. Slowly he put back on his shirt and limped out of the kitchen.

Latvia was there to greet him in the hallway.

"L-Lithuania, a-are you okay? I'm so, so, s-sorry!" Latvia wrapped his skinny arms around Lithuania's thin torso and buried his head in his older brother's shirt. Lithuania gasped, but couldn't bring himself to make Latvia let go, not when he was so obviously distraught. He ran his fingers through golden curls. "It's okay Latti. It's okay, don't cry. Hey, look at me."

Latvia let out a whimper. "I'm sorry!" he wailed again, voice muffled.

"Latti," Lithuania said softly, "I'm not mad, honest. It's okay. I don't mind taking the punishment for you. Remember, I told you years ago you could always blame your accidents on me, and I wouldn't care." Sometimes, in his secret heart of hearts, Lithuania regretted telling his two brothers that. They never blamed things on him, but Lithuania felt that they expected him to step in. But then again, that was his job, he _had_ to protect them. They shouldn't be beaten, after all, they had never been empires, they couldn't handle it.

Latvia sobbed harder, while Lithuania stroked his hair. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" he questioned gently. Unloading was Latvia's best combat against guilt.

With watery, violet eyes, Latvia looked at him. "I-I was angry, so I, I, I…dumped it in the garden."

Lithuania froze. "W-what?"

"I dumped out the vodka!" Latvia wailed. Lithuania pried the little nation off him and looked into his eyes, his own blue eyes desperate and pleading. "You dumped it out on purpose?"

Shame-faced, Latvia nodded.

"B-but, weren't you afraid of the punishment? Didn't you care about what Russia would do to you?" Lithuania pleaded, dreading the answer, but refusing to believe it might be true. _This will all make sense in a moment. Latvia wouldn't do that to me._

"I…" Latvia choked, "I knew you would take it for me."

The pain in his back was nothing compared to the pain in his chest. He stared at Latvia. "No," he whispered, frantically shaking his head. "No. You wouldn't do that to me. You love me. You wouldn't…I…"

"Lithy, I'm sorry. Please…"

"Don't you dare speak to me," Lithuania snarled, cutting him off. "Don't you ever speak to me again."

Latvia turned pale. "Lithy, please, just listen to me!" The little boy begged, and tried to hold Lithuania's hand, but the older nation backed away. "How could you do that?" he repeated again. His face twisted as he tried to stop the tears, tried to stop the ache in his heart. Turning on his heal, he sprinted away, the pain in his back momentarily forgotten. He left Latvia standing in the hall, whispering over and over. "Lietuvai, es atvainojos. Lūdzu atgriezies. Lūdzu, nevilcini. Man žēl. Es esmu tik žēl."

XXX

Lithuania was able to make it to the library before he collapsed. He rested his head on a soft chair -that he wasn't allowed to sit on unless he had Mr. Russia's express permission-sobbing.

"Lithuania?" He jumped and turned around to see Estonia standing in the doorway. Frantically, he scrubbed his eyes, trying to erase all traces of tears. "Estonia," he said with a forced smile, "I was going to dust in here. It really needs it."

"I'll help you," Estonia replied, walking in and pulling Lithuania to his feet. He stared at the bloodied shirt. "Did Mr. Russia bandage you after…"

Lithuania blushed and shook his head, wilting a bit when he saw Estonia's face tighten. "You know I hate it when you do that. If he doesn't clean you up, you need to come to me. It's not good for your wounds to go untreated. That's how you get sick." He let out a sigh. "And you've ruined your shirt. I may not clean clothes, but I've seen the hours you clean to get blood stains out." With a disappointed shake of his head, he grabbed Lithuania's hand and tugged on it. "Let's go to the bathroom and get you cleaned up."

"Mr. Russia wanted the chores done."

"I think Mr. Russia would be angrier at having to buy you another shirt."

They stood in silence, trying to decide on the best course of action. Whatever they chose, Russia would be angry, so it was merely deciding which would make him less angry. As in all cases involving Russia, Estonia followed Lithuania's led.

"I…I probably should get cleaned up," the brunette eventually determined, and they two made their way to the bathroom.

Estonia didn't make a sound when Lithuania pulled off his shirt, but he did grow noticeably pale. Like usual, Lithuania refused to meet his eyes, instead staring at his hands in shame. No matter how many times Estonia lied and promised it didn't bother him, Lithuania refused to believe him, his damaged back becoming one of his most touchy insecurities.

In silence, Estonia took a damp washcloth, and lighting dabbed it against the scarred back. Typically, they worked in silence. He hated the silence, it allowed his mind to wander to places he didn't like, but he respected Lithuania enough not to demand he to talk. However, he was very surprised when Lithuania mumbled something.

"Sorry, I didn't hear you. Am I hurting you?" He asked.

"No. I just wondered…do you love me?"

Estonia blushed. "W-what?"

"I just…do you love me? Actually care for me? Or am I just a convenient shield to hide behind. Someone to blame all your mistakes on so Mr. Russia doesn't beat you?" The bitterness in Lithuania's voice surprised Estonia. _Where is this coming from?_ "We didn't ask you to take on our punishments Leedu. That was something you chose all on your own…but, of course I care for you. You're my brother."

Lithuania captured Estonia gaze with an intense look. "Do you ever do something you _know_ will make Mr. Russia mad, just because you know it's be me who gets in trouble and not you?"

Hot emotion flared up. "You really think me that cruel? That selfish? That I think you as just a walking, talking meat shield?"

Lithuania bowed his head. "Latvia does," he whispered.

"What?"

"It was Latvia who dumped out Mr. Russia's vodka. On purpose. And he wasn't afraid of getting in trouble…because he knew he could blame it on me!" Lithuania dissolved into tears, covering his face with his hands. Estonia desperately wished for the silence again. Forget talking, anything would be better than watching his brother cry. That was something he didn't know how to fix.

"I'm sure your just mistaken," he finally said.

Lithuania shook his head. "No. He told me so himself."

Estonia didn't know how to respond. _That doesn't sound like Latvia, but Lithuania is normally so good at reading people._

Lithuania sighed. "I don't want to see him," he confessed.

"Lithuania," Estonia began sadly,

"I know, I know, I have too. But I won't talk to him. I _can't_ talk to him." He looked at Estonia, eyes glimmering with emotion, desperate to be told everything would be okay, that it was all a dream. There were somethings Estonia couldn't lie about.

"I understand," was all he could say. "I…I don't really blame you." Lithuania let out a sob of relief and clung to Estonia burring his face in his shoulder. Estonia stiffened, shivering as he felt a few tears on his neck. He didn't push Lithuania away, and he awkwardly patted his hair. In a moment Lithuania had his emotions once more under control. "Sorry, I know you hate being hugged."

"Yeah." Estonia agreed weakly. "Sorry."

Lithuania smiled at him, and Estonia breathed a sigh in relief. Good, everyone was back to normal…except the relationship with Latvia and Lithuania, but that could be dealt with.

"Would you bandage my back now?" Lithuania asked cautiously.

"I should probably remove the glass first."

Lithuania looked down, humiliation rolling off him in waves. "We're not allowed. It has to stay in for a week."

Estonia pursed his lips, but bandaged Lithuania and helped him into a new shirt. All in silence.

XXX

The week past at an agonizing crawl. Lithuania limped around the house, dutifully attending his chores, though he had bitten his lip to a bloody mess in attempts to stifle whimpers of pain. The first few days, Latvia followed his brother around like a forlorn puppy, begging for forgiveness. Lithuania refused to speak, or even look at him, and eventually, Latvia gave up.

"Give him time," Estonia whispered one night when Lithuania was already asleep and all three were curled up in the bed. "You really hurt him Latti."

"I didn't mean too. I was just so angry at Mr. Russia, that I didn't think. And then I just put the bottles back. I should've hidden them or told Mr. Russia, but I was so scared Est! And whenever Lithy gets in trouble, sometimes I hear him _howling_ in pain and if it hurts enough to make _him_ cry then, then," a few tears trailed down his nose. He snuggled close to Estonia. "Will he ever forgive me?"

Estonia didn't respond, thinking hard. Lithuania was forgiving by nature, but this was a personal betrayal. Latvia stared up at him with watery eyes, awaiting his verdict. "I," Estonia said slowly, "I don't know how much time it will take…but yes, I do believe he will forgive you."

"I wish it were now," Latvia whimpered. "I miss him a lot."

XXX

At the end of the week, late in the evening, Russia called Lithuania to the breakfast room. The table had been cleared and covered with a white sheet. On a tea-tray sat a rusty looking pair of tweezers, and a knife. "Alright Litva, I believe you've learned from your punishment, da?"

"Yes sir, I have."

"Good," Russia cooed. "How about you tell me what it was that you learned."

"To never steal from you, as you always find out," Lithuania gave his response to the floor.

"And…" Russia prompted.

"You'd rather be angry at me instead of me lying to you."

"That's right little one, good boy."

Lithuania balled his fists. He hated being spoken to like a child! It made him feel stupid. Russia said he was stupid, but Lithuania was determined not to believe him. However, given his belief that Latvia actually cared for him…well, Lithuania was certainly not doing much to dispel that image.

"Come to me Litvuska." Slowly Lithuania edged closer to Russia. The man banged his fist on the table, and Lithuania flinched, head snapping up. He expected to see anger, but instead, the giant was smiling at him with soft eyes. "Hop up!" he said again, banging on the table. The noises made Lithuania flinch, but he understood that Russia was not toying with him, not trying to make him afraid, rather, he was simply unaware of just how much force his was using.

With help from Russia, Lithuania climbed on to the table. There he sat with legs dangling over the edge. "Shirt off Litva," Russia told him gently. With trembling hands Lithuania struggled with the buttons. Panic set in when he was unable to open them. He started panting and shaking. _Get a hold of yourself Lietuva!_ He snapped. _I can't. I'm scared. What's he going to do? I don't like not knowing. Oh god, not knowing, that's the worst part of it!_

Russia made a noise, but Lithuania was too scared to look up. "I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me Mr. Russia. I'll do better, I promise."

A large hand patted russet hair. "Hush little one. I'll help you." Without asking, Russia's hands attacked Lithuania's buttons, easily undoing them. Lithuania sat child-like, staring at his master with wide, round, eyes. He winced when Russia threw his shirt on the floor. He would prefer it to be folded, or at least draped over a chair.

Gently Russia guided Lithuania onto his stomach. "Alright Litvuska, here's the plan da? You have thirty-six teeny pieces of glass in your back. I will remove all of them, and then you will go to bed a happy nation because you have learned from your punishment and been forgiven." The voice was so high pitched, and happy, it didn't match the situation at all.

"Yes sir."

"Good boy, let's begin-oh, I almost forgot!" Lithuania raised his head, alarm coursing through his veins as Russia scurried off, and appeared a moment later. He clucked his tongue and forced Lithuania's head back down, but this time, his cheek was met with the soft fabric of Russia's favorite pillow. "Now you'll be more comfortable!" Russia said happily.

Lithuania just stared at him.

The large nation let out a sigh. "Oh Litvuska." He ran his thumb over Lithuania's eyes, which quickly closed, only to open them when the digit was gone. "You have such pretty eyes," Russia told him, running a thick finger over once-again closed eyelids. He stroked Lithuania's cheek, and Lithuania opened his eyes again. "But you look so frightened! Why? You shouldn't be scared. I keep telling you, your punishment is over. Now I just have to remove the glass."

Lithuania whimpered.

"No, no!" Russia cooed. "It won't hurt. This is not a punishment."

 _It will, it will!_ Lithuania wanted to sob. _Pain doesn't depend on if your good or not!_

"Repeat after me Litvuska. This,"

"…This-"

"Is not-"

"I-is not-"

"A punishment."

"A p-p-pun-punishment."

"Good boy! You feel better, da?"

Lithuania nodded yes, while inside he screamed _no._

"Then we shall begin."

Lithuania buried his face in the pillow. He could feel the coolness of the tweezers on his back, trying to get a grip on a shard. _Deep breathes, in and out, in and out, in and-_

"Aghh!" A primal scream tore itself from Lithuania's throat. Removing the glass hurt, it was so much worse than going in. And Russia didn't know how to be gentle. He gave another yank and Lithuania howled. "Litva! What's wrong?"

"It hurts!" Lithuania wailed.

"No," Russia said, though he sounded doubtful, "you are mistaken. You merely think it hurts, but it doesn't da? Now shh, I don't like it when you cry."

He moved on to another piece of glass, trying to tear it out. Over the course of a week, the skin slowly started repairing itself, and grew over the pieces. Another sharp tug and the glass slid free.

"S-stop, stop, stop!" Lithuania begged. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry- _aghnn!"_

A third piece of glass came out, and Russia paused, staring at down at Lithuania. The small nation had accidentally pushed the pillow to the floor, and was trembling, eyes scrunched closed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he continued to whisper, "please no more."

Tears pricked violet eyes. This wasn't supposed to happen. His little friend was not supposed to cry so. This wasn't a punishment, it wasn't meant to hurt. Russia wiped at his eyes, he couldn't do this, not when Lithuania hadn't done anything wrong. He needed to prove that this was _not_ a punishment.

"Estonia! Latvia! Come!" He called at the top of his lungs. A large smile formed when they quickly rushed in. _So obedient,_ Russia thought as he beamed at them, _they must really like me._

"You two would like to help me, da?"

Two shaky _da_ 's came back. _Poor boys, Litva's screams must have upset them._

"Good, Estonia, you will remove the glass from Litva's back. Latvia, you and I will talk to Litva and keep him calm. Let me know if you need rope Estonia. Litva can be incredibly squirmy."

Estonia nodded gravely and picked up the tweezers.

Lithuania watched this exchange with half-lidded eyes, and deep, shuddering breaths. He couldn't scream now, not now that his brothers were here, he didn't want to scare them. Russia crouched down in front of his face with a smile. "Don't worry Litva. I'm here, nothing's going to hurt you." He stroked the brunette locks and nodded at Estonia, a sign to start.

XXX

In the end, it took an hour and a half to remove all the glass from Lithuania's back. Much to Estonia's chagrin, he had to ask Russia to tie his brother down because the injured nation slipped into a blind panic and fought to escape Estonia. Half way through the process, Russia left the room and didn't come back. Estonia heard him mumble something about _vodka_ , _too much blood_ , and _not a punishment Litva._ There was a lot of blood, in fact, Lithuania's back was slick with it, and the sheets were probably permanently stained. Estonia quickly ripped the last piece of glass from Lithuania's back, thinking to hell with being gentle this needed to be over now. He sank to the ground, holding his head in bloodied hands. "We're done," he managed to get out. "It's over Lithuania." The oldest Baltic said nothing, merely lay exhausted on the table, throat sore from screaming, and wrists and ankles rubbed raw from the binds.

Latvia was trembling in a corner, tears pouring down his face. "I'm sorry Lithuania. I'm so sorry."

Lithuania gave a weak moan. He lay still for a minute longer, then forced himself off the table. His legs nearly gave out, but he gripped the table, hard and forced remained upright.

"We had better get you cleaned up," he croaked to Estonia. The younger brother looked up, normally impassive face glistening with tears. "I didn't want to," he said.

"I know. It's okay, let's go."

"W-what about Latvia?"

Lithuania cast a glance at the boy in the corner. He looked so tiny and miserable. Lithuania's head hurt, he didn't know what to do, forgive or keep himself protected from the little traitor. "Leedu," Estonia whispered gently. "Please."

"Come on Latvia, Estonia needs your help."

XXX

Despite the bloody mess of mangled flesh, Lithuania insisted Estonia wash the blood from his hands first. He was equally insistent that Estonia change clothes. "Don't worry about me," he cooed in a scratchy voice, his throat still sore. "You get into bed, you've had a rough day."

"What about you?" Estonia asked, not able to meet the blue eyes.

"I'll help him," Latvia said. Lithuania stiffened but then smiled. "Yes, Latvia will help me. Go to bed, you'll feel better in the morning." He pressed a gentle kiss on Estonia's temple. "It wasn't your fault Est. I don't blame you, that was all Mr. Russia." Estonia nodded, then hurried to the bedroom, furiously sniffling.

Latvia cast Lithuania a shy glance. "So how does…"

"I have it under control," Lithuania told him sharply.

"W-what?"

"I can clean myself up and bandage myself just fine. You can go ahead and leave."

"B-but I want to help!" Latvia sniffled.

"I don't want your," Lithuania snarled but forced himself to relax. There was no need to terrorize Latvia. "I have it under control." He said evenly. "You go get ready for bed."

Sadly, Latvia turned to go, pausing in the door way. He took a deep breath and turned back around. The Latvian boy trembled fiercely, but his eyes were steady. "I'm telling Mr. Russia."

"What?"

"I-I'm going to t-tell Mr. R-Russia that i-it was me who d-d-dumped out his vodka."

Lithuania stared at him.

"I h-h-hate that you h-hate me!" Latvia whimpered. "A-and if I-I-I tell Mr. Russia, m-maybe you'll see t-that y-you're my b-brother, n-not a m-my h-human shield."

Lithuania still stared, unable to form a word.

Latvia gave a trembling smile. "I love you Lithuania. You're my big brother." He turned and walked out the door.

Lithuania sat frozen, trying to understand what was happening. "No!" he screeched, barreling out of the bathroom and grabbing Latvia. "No," he whispered in the messy curls. "I f-forgive you."

"R-really?"

Lithuania nodded, so Latvia kissed him on his cheek. "I've missed you so much Lithy. So much. And I'm so, so, so, so, so sorry for getting you in trouble. I promise I won't ever do it again."

"Never on purpose," Lithuania amended.

"Never, ever," Latvia firmly insisted.

Lithuania didn't reply, so Latvia hugged him again, resting his head on Lithuania's chest. Despite the overwhelming scent of blood, Latvia could smell his brother. He smelled faintly of wheat and sunshine.

They stay like that, holding each other on the hallway floor, till morning, where Russia found them curled together and fast asleep.


	2. Estonia vs Lithuania

Well, it took forever, but here is Chapter Two! I hope you all enjoy it. Stay tuned, chapter three featuring Latvia will be coming soon in the next few weeks. Thank you all so much for honoring me by reading, and please enjoy.

Chapter 2: Estonia Vs Lithuania

Estonia lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Latvia slept on, curled next to him. Lithuania wasn't with them. Estonia had no idea what the nation was getting up to, though he felt certain it had to do with sucking up to Russia. _Probably singing the monster a lullaby_ , he thought bitterly. Estonia thumped his head against the pillow. Thoughts of Lithuania were the last thing he wanted.

The Baltics' room didn't have a window, but Estonia could guess the time. Russia had already told them goodnight, and Estonia had traced his heavy footsteps. It had sounded like Russia went to his room. He didn't hear the footsteps again. If Estonia wanted to leave, now was the time.

Carefully, he slid out of the covers. He was dressed to leave, never having changed into night-clothes. Habit allowed him to find his shoes and sweater without a light. Though almost spring, there was still a bite in the air during the night and early morning; a sweater was needed.

In the dark, he could make out a Latvia shaped lump, a slow rise, and fall under the covers. "Goodbye Latvia. Stay safe. I hope to see you on the other side," Estonia whispered, careful not to wake his brother. They already bid a tearful goodbye and ever stoic Estonia couldn't bear to do it again. He planted a kiss on Latvia's head and left.

The kitchen was farthest from Russia's room, making its back door the perfect escape route. Estonia entered the kitchen, spooking when he saw Lithuania standing by the counter. " _Mu Jumal,"_ he hissed, heart trying to escape his chest. "You scared me!"

"Sorry," Lithuania said, "I didn't mean to frighten you. I came to say goodbye."

As his brother approached, Estonia studied his face. Pinched, weary and sickly pale, Lithuania would look ill if not for his two gleaming orbs. Those bright eyes bore a hole in Estonia, but he refused to be put off. "Well, Lithuania," he said, words clipped, "I must say, I'm surprised you would bring yourself to say goodbye." Lithuania flinched, which made Estonia feel good.

"You're my brother Est. Of course, I would say goodbye." He looked miserable, but attempted a smile. "Here, I brought you my hat and scarf, so you'll stay warm. And, I baked an extra piece of bread, just for you." The brunette planted the hat on Estonia's head, making sure it covered his ears. Then, Lithuania tied on the scarf, snug but not too tight.

"How did you convince Mr. Russia to give you these?" Russia always kept the Baltics' winter clothes in his own room. If they needed them, permission had to be granted.

Lithuania waved his hand. "It doesn't matter." The action was flippant, but Lithuania's voice was grave.

He handed over the bread, still warm. "You're all set," Lithuania pronounced. He smiled nervously.

Estonia immediately felt awful for trying hurt Lithuania, while said nation made goodbye preparations.

"Thank you, Lithuania," he said, trying to project as much warmth and gratitude as possible. It must have worked, because Lithuania gave him a tiny smile.

The clock chimed and both nations jumped. "I-I'd better go." Estonia stammered. He had to do this, no matter how scared he was, he had to leave.

"Don't Estonia." Lithuania begged. Estonia sighed. _We've had this conversation so many times. Why do you do this?_

"I'm going Lithuania."

The brunette's lips pursed. "You're going to get Latvia and me in trouble. Mr. Russia will be so mad. Estonia please, he beat me last night, I don't want another one so soon. Please, if you love me don't do this to me. Latvia and I are your brothers, don't leave us to face the beast!"

"Like you're one to talk," Estonia snarled. "Remember '31? You didn't seem to worried about Latvia and I having to face the beast then. "I don't know why you're so mad," he spread his arms, smiling sardonically, "I'm only following my older brother's example."

Lithuania's eyes flashed. "My _people_ planned that rebellion. You're acting on your own here."

Estonia tightened his hands around the bread. It squished between his fingers. If he didn't have something to hold, Estonia knew he'd slap Lithuania.

"You were just as involved in planning those rebellions as your people. Don't pretend you were acting on their behalf. If anything, you stirred them up."

Lithuania opened his mouth, but Estonia continued on. "Look, I know you care for me, and I you, but my loyalty is not to you, it's to Estonia as a whole. The people, the ideas, that's who I represent. And I'm sick of watching Russia and his children mistreat mine. I'm leaving and we will fight. If you're a casualty of my leaving, then I apologize but so be it."

For a fleeting moment, hurt flashed across Lithuania's face, before he grew impassive. "Fine. Leave then. When you reach Estonia, say a prayer for Latvia and me, if you remember. Though by then Mr. Russia will probably have tortured us past the point of needing one."

"Then come with me! If you're scared come with me!" He went eye to eye with his older brother. "Lithuania, you and Latvia could come with me." He cleared his throat. Unconsciously, he rubbed his palms against his pant leg. "Please, come with me. I don't want to leave you here."

"We can't. If Mr. Russia catches us…" Estonia shoved Lithuania. "You're a coward Lithuania," he spat, marching to the door. "You claim to hate this place. You claim to want freedom. But when it's offered, you run scared." The door squeaked open, and the darkness greeted them. "Russia's boots are dirty Litva. Better go lick them clean." Estonia slammed the door; his final goodbye.

XXX

Estonia had never been one for reckless endeavors, and his escape proved no different. He dedicated weeks to its preparation. In the library, Russia kept several detailed maps of his country. Estonia had snuck them back to his room, scrutinizing them late into the night, spending hours tracing different routes, despite his brothers' complaining about the light. He decided that the best way to go would be to head north and escape back home by way of Finland. It was risky; he was good friends with Finland, something Russia knew, and therefore it might appear as the most obvious route. However, that was what Estonia was counting on. It would be so obvious that no one would think he'd go that way. Estonia was known for being smart, and the smartest route would have been to go south or east; Russia would never guess he went north.

He tramped across the terrain in darkness. He was kilometers from the mansion when the first sounds of the birds' morning songs started. There was no settlement around, just empty land. Knowing it was safe, Estonia whistled back to the birds. For a while, they sang to each other. This was the happiest Estonia felt in a long time. The sunrise was beautiful, and he spent time singing Estonian tunes to the birds. If he were still at Russia's he'd be starting on his chores. Russia insisted his servants were up before the sun. Estonia's stomach twisted as the faces of his brothers bombarded his mind. He hated leaving Lithuania after a fight, but it was the other's fault. Lithuania loved to play the victim; bowing and scraping to Russia, but then crying himself to sleep if he thought his brothers were asleep.

Lithuania had rebelled Russia before. And some days a spark would enter his eye and he would antagonize Russia, seeming to revel in the torture dealt to him. So why deny Estonia the chance to leave? Why not come? Estonia had begged both of them to come with him, but they said no.

The morning wore on and by now Russia had to know he was missing. Heavy clouds hung low in the sky, promising rain later. Estonia pressed on, consulting his notes to make sure he was going the right way. A horse neighed somewhere behind him, and he could hear braying dogs. Estonia's blood ran cold. For the entire trip, he hadn't seen anyone. "You're overreacting," he told himself. "It's just someone passing by." He picked up his pace.

The barking grew louder, and Estonia broke into a run. A gun fired, the bullet whizzing by him. "Estonia!" Russia hollered. "I see you."

This couldn't be happening. Russia couldn't have found him, especially not so soon.

Though Estonia ran, Russia quickly caught up with him. He pulled his horse alongside Estonia and slammed the butt of the rifle into his head. Estonia hit the ground, as if dead.

XXX

A slamming door brought Estonia out of unconscious. Russia was carrying him into the house. Latvia and Lithuania came scurrying from different rooms at the sound of their arrival. When Lithuania saw Estonia, he slapped a hand to his throat. "Mr. Russia," he croaked, "you found him."

"I did. And now Estonia and I are going to have a little chat in the basement." He looked at the Estonian in his arms. "Oh good, you're awake." He dropped Estonia, letting him hit the floor; hard.

"Mr. Russia," Lithuania said, big eyes pleading up at their master. "Please don't hurt Estonia. He wasn't thinking clearly. He's been under a lot of stress lately and—"

"Silence Litva," Russia barked. "He ran away. There is no excuse for betraying family like that."

Lithuania looked panicked. Estonia prayed his brother would think of something to get him out of this.

"Please Mr. Russia, do you have to punish him? He just made a small mistake."

"You think betrayal is small, Litva?"

"No! No, of course not," Lithuania said, back-peddling frantically. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Well that's how it sounded. Are you needing a reminder of loyalty too? Because if so, I can arrange that after I deal with Estonia. After all, he is wearing _your_ hat and scarf."

Lithuania gulped audibly, "I'm sorry sir."

Russia started walking toward the basement, dragging Estonia by the hair. "It is fine Litva."

"I'll take his punishment!" Lithuania shouted, not a waver in his voice. "In the name of family loyalty."

Russia smiled at Lithuania. "Ah Litvuska. You're a good big brother." He ruffled Lithuania's hair, and cupped Lithuania's chin. "I know you don't like for your brothers to be punished," he said, thumb rubbing little circles on Lithuania's check. "But this time, it must Estonia who has to learn. You can't take this one."

"But—"

The hand tightened. "No buts, Little One, or I will think you're forgetting your place."

Lithuania lowered his eyes. "Sorry sir."

"Da, there's the good Litvuska I know and love. I'll be back." Saying so, he dragged Estonia down the stairs, leaving Lithuania alone.

Russia's basement reeked of blood. The air was damp and musty. Russia threw Estonia onto the ground. His chin bounced against the hard floor. His head spun. Russia hauled him to his knees, and placed Estonia in handcuffs chaining him to the wall.

"You tried to leave," he snarled. "You tried to leave me. We're family Estonia."

"I'm sorry, sir, agh!" The whip cut across his back. The pain was shocking, and the noise the whip made, Estonia hated it.

Russia struck him again. "You don't leave your family! You stay with them!"

Estonia howled.

"I am your family. You have to stay with me. You have to love me, and Latvia and Litva. You can not leave!"

 _Swish, swish,_ went the whip, each strike tearing the flesh, painting Estonia's back with blood. "Do you even know what family means?" Russia growled. "You are not worthy of your family. Of us who love you so deeply."

The whip struck him a few more times. "You will learn though."

The beating was brutal, and Estonia was barely conscious when Russia finished with him. He lay on the floor, feeling his blood run sluggishly down his sides.

"I'll leave you now," Russia told him, "so you can think about your actions. We are family, Estonia, and families don't try to run away from each other, da?"

"Yes sir," Estonia groaned.

"Good boy. I'm so glad I found you before you got very far. It was a good thing Litva told me where you had gotten off too. I almost went the wrong way. He is a good nation; you should try to be more like him. You are very smart. I think that will be easy for you."

He planted a kiss on Estonia's sweaty brow. "You stay here and think. We won't think of this again."

Russia climbed up the stairs and it was just a few short moments before Estonia could hear Lithuania running down.

"Estonia," he whispered. "Oh god. Are you awake?"

Estonia let out a small whimper, and Lithuania was immediately by his side. "I'm so sorry Estonia. I never wanted this to happen to you."

Lithuania's hands were cool, as he cradled Estonia's head. "I've got you. Don't worry. You're safe now, just relax. I've brought some bandages and water. Can you sit up?"

With great effort and great help, Estonia managed to sit up. "Here," Lithuania handed him a glass of water. "I know you must be thirsty…I always am. Take small sips."

Estonia drank greedily, as Lithuania gently washed off the blood. Apologies spilled from his lips every time Estonia so much as winced. "It's not too bad," relief was evident in the elder's voice. "I thought he would do much worse." At the tightening of Estonia's shoulders, Lithuania amended his statement. "Not that it doesn't hurt any less, but it could have been so much worse." Lithuania rested his head on Estonia's shoulder when the bandaging was done. "I was so worried about you Est. Latvia and I could hear you, and oh god," he choked on a sob. "I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you."

"It's okay," Estonia said. "It wasn't your fault."

Lithuania let out a shaky breath. "Latvia is upstairs making you some soup. Let me help you to bed and we'll bring you some. You can rest, and you'll feel so much better tomorrow. I won't lie, it'll still hurt, but I promise you'll feel better."

"Okay," Estonia rasped. His voice was almost gone, he couldn't remember the last time he screamed like that. His respect for Lithuania doubled, for Lithuania always made an effort to bite down screams. If he could.

Lithuania slung Estonia's arm over his shoulders and helped him up. "Lean on me," he said softly, "I've got you."

Slowly, the two started the journey up the stairs. "Do you know what Mr. Russia said to me?" Estonia panted.

"Shh," came the expected chide, "Don't talk. Whatever Mr. Russia said about you, it's not true."

"I know," he let out a chuckle, despite Lithuania's persistent shushing. "He tried to tell me _you_ told him how to find me. But I know that's not true. It's funny, he tries to tear us apart, despite _family loyalty._ "

Lithuania stiffed. "Estonia," his voice was tight. "I accidentally did tell Mr. Russia how to find you."

Estonia stopped, even though Lithuania tried to tug him on. "You 'accidentally' told him? How do you do 'accidentally,' tell someone that?"

Lithuania bit his lip, grip tightening on Estonia's arm. He didn't make eye contact. "Lithuania," Estonia growled, "tell me."

"It was an accident, I promise. I was up all night thinking about it; how to protect Latvia and me, but also you! Please believe me, I didn't sleep at all, but kept trying to brainstorm. I really, really, really didn't want a beating, but if Mr. Russia found you gone, he'd skin me!" At this he did look at Estonia. His eyes were lit with fear. "I had one just the other night, I didn't think I could handle one so soon. I was scared Estonia, but then I thought of something. When it was time for chores, I woke Mr. Russia up and told him I couldn't find you. I said that last night, you crawled over me to go to the bathroom, but that I fell asleep before you came back. That was when you escaped, I said. The hard part was telling him which way to go. It took me hours, because I knew you were so smart. You're much smarter than me. Finally, I settled on you going north, because that seemed the least-like you thing to do. I didn't know you _had_ gone that way! If I did, I never would have said!"

There was silence. "I, I understand if you're mad at me—"

Estonia cut him off by punching him in the jaw. "Of course, I'm mad at you!" He snarled, ignoring Lithuania's worried look. "Your back," he whispered, but Estonia punched him again. "You ratted me out just because you were afraid of a little beating."

"I, I, I," Lithuania sputtered, as Estonia continued to rage. "You damn hypocrite! Remember when you were oh so sad, a few decades ago because Latvia betrayed you with the vodka bottles? Well now you go and do the same to me!" He swung, wanting to get another hit, but Lithuania gripped his hand, holding it like a lifeline.

"No," Lithuania pleaded, "it's not like that. Estonia, please calm down. You'll hurt yourself."

True to the words, Estonia's exhausted body gave out, and he pitched forward. Lithuania was there to catch him. He clung tightly to his older brother, if only because he was the sole reason Estonia was standing.

"Estonia, please, I'm so sorry," Lithuania's voice hitched in his ear. "I didn't mean to get you into trouble. I thought I was doing the right thing, Hey! W-what are you doing?"

Estonia had managed to untuck Lithuania's shirt, and his hand crept up Lithuania's back, touching his scars.

"If you're truly sorry, then don't move." Lithuania stilled, but in a tiny voice begged Estonia to stop.

Estonia's original plan was to humiliate Lithuania. To drag his nails down what brought him the most shame, and berate the nation for subjugating Estonia to the same thing. But as he felt the thick ridges, crisscrossing over each other, he felt awful. How many times had he bandaged Lithuania? How many times had he been to one to walk down the basement stairs to find his older brother? Lithuania never got Estonia or Latvia in trouble, neither accidentally or purposely. In fact, it was Lithuania who normally took on the punishment his brothers would have received. Who was he to think that Lithuania would send Russia after him, just to could avoid a punishment? Didn't the scars on his back speak otherwise?

Estonia's anger left him. He gave a stuttering sigh and removed his hand. "I'm sorry Lithuania."

Lithuania shook his head. "It's my fault, I'm sorry. I'm sorry," Estonia stopped him. "I was consumed with saving myself and my people. I knew it would be bad for you and Latvia, but I put it out of my mind. I couldn't face it. I should have made a plan with you two, that way I could leave but you could be safe. You were just trying to protect yourself and Latvia."

"You as well," Lithuania insisted. "I never would have told Mr. Russia to go north if I knew you went that way. And I'm sorry I couldn't have saved you from a beating. I'm sorry. Oh Estonia, if I could do it all over again…I promise I never meant to get you caught."

Estonia whimpered, and buried his face in Lithuania's neck. "I knew you wouldn't betray me. You're a good person Lithuania. I'm so sorry."

"Hey, it's okay." He stroked Estonia's hair. "Don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. It's hard to know what's the best thing to do in these situations. Don't cry."

Estonia looked up at him through tears. "While Mr. Russia was whipping me, he was spouting all this crazy nonsense about family loyalty. Maybe…well…you, Latvia and I are all a family. I know I said earlier that my loyalty was only to my people, but maybe…now I think that it should also be to each other. Only cause, here in Mr. Russia's house, we need to look out for each other. Don't you think?"

Lithuania looked relieved. "Yes! I'll always look out for you. Next time, I'll take the beating. I should have tried harder—"

"No. That's not what I meant. Just that, we should make sure we don't leave each other at the mercies of Mr. Russia. Like I did to you, and like you did to us with your rebellion in 1831. I don't how we can get that to work quite yet…but what I'm trying to say is…you're my brother, and I love you."

Lithuania looked overjoyed, Estonia didn't often say that. "I love you too."

"Good." Estonia shifted. "Now, I think you promised me soup and bed?"

"Yes, slow steps now. And please, don't talk so much, you need to rest your voice." Lithuania fussed over him, and Estonia allowed it. The two made it upstairs were Latvia was waiting with a warm bowl of soup, and a smile.


	3. Latvia vs Estonia

Well, as promised in _Cinderella,_ here is the last chapter of _Loss of Trust._ I really liked writing Latvia, but Estonia is so hard to write. He's very enigmatic, a real puzzle. I hope I did him justice.

Thank you so much for honoring me by reading, and please enjoy the final installment of _Loss of Trust._

* * *

Latvia lay curled in a small ball under the covers. His eyes were closed, and he lay still, but he was wide awake. The tiny bed felt too big and too cold without his older brothers. Alone, Latvia could feel tears burning behind his eyelids. Estonia and Lithuania weren't here in bed with him, and though he knew it wasn't true, a small part of his brain said it was because they didn't care.

" _Poor Little Latvia. What use are you to your brothers? Litva protects you both at the cost of his own comfort. Estonia is smart, he always helps you or Litva when there is a problem. But you do nothing, da? They don't need you, and eventually, they will stop pretending to care."_ Those hateful, crushing words of Russia's played on repeat in his brain. Latvia knew he wasn't like Lithuania and Estonia. They were special; they were great. As he lay there in the dark, he reviewed his life… he'd accomplished nothing. Never been an empire, never invented something cool, never had power. And in Russia's house, everything was worse, because here he still was nothing, except he was always getting his brothers into trouble.

The door to their room creaked open, very slowly, and there was the sound of two sets of footsteps: Lithuania and Estonia. It seemed to Latvia that they were moving sluggish, and knew it was because Lithuania was hurt. Without even opening his eyes, he could see it clearly; Lithuania would be leaning heavily on Estonia, trembling from the exertion of standing upright. His face would be frighteningly pale, with large beads of sweat clinging to his hairline. His hair would be matted because though Estonia always tried to clean Lithuania after a beating, it was only the bare necessities. Lithuania's marred skinny torso would be wrapped in off-white bandages, that in Latvia's opinion, made him look even worse.

"Easy, Lithuania," Estonia whispered. Latvia could here Lithuania struggling to control his panting, not wanting to wake the "sleeping" brother.

"Lay down."

Latvia felt the bed dip. "Esti," Lithuania pleaded. _"_ Please, I need my shirt." Estonia's footsteps went to the tiny wardrobe. Then they came back to the bed.

"Thank you," Lithuania breathed. He made tiny pained noises as he struggled into his nightshirt with Estonia's help. No matter how many times Estonia and Latvia begged, Lithuania always wore a shirt after any punishment, regardless of how badly the fabric hurt. Even Russia couldn't persuade Lithuania to keep it off. The few times he had forcibly kept Lithuania shirtless out of genuine concern and protection, Lithuania had huddled under the covers no matter how Russia threatened, pleaded, and bribed. Lithuania's shirt was his only protection against the humiliation of his disfigured body, and he wore it even if it caused him more pain. Frankly, it confused Latvia, because the few times he had endured a beating, he gladly kept his shirt off, feeling none of the shame Lithuania carried. Even though Latvia and Estonia had assured him many times they didn't mind seeing his scared back, that it didn't disgust them, didn't make them sick, didn't do anything to them, Lithuania stubbornly wore a shirt.

There was a tiny _click_ and a little bit of light. Latvia opened his eyes; Estonia had turned on their bedside lamp. The covers shifted away from Latvia, as Estonia crawled into his spot in the middle of the bed. It was his turn for the pillow and Estonia propped it up against the headboard, leaning his back against it. Lithuania lay beside him on his belly, head cushioned on his hands.

"I'm going to read a little tonight. Is that okay with you, Lithuania?"

"Mmhmm," Lithuania murmured. The exhaustion in his voice was evident.

"I won't keep it on too long, I know you're tired. I just…."

"Have to clear your mind," Lithuania finished. He chuckled, which turned into a cough. "Don't worry, read as long as you like. I'm tired enough to fall asleep with the light on."

 _You didn't ask me._ Latvia thought bitterly. _Lithuania's not the only one here who could be affected by the light._ It was just the proof he needed that Estonia, at least, didn't care about him. Lithuania would probably never reveal his true feelings. He was just too nice.

Estonia pulled the covers back up, bending his knees slightly so that the thin quilt they used in the summertime only ghosted over Lithuania's back.

"You didn't ask me." Latvia sat up and glared at Estonia. Lithuania wearily lifted his head, "Latti, you're awake." Latvia wished Lithuania would lay back down and go to sleep. There were bruises on along his jaw and cheek, and he had a dark, black eye. He needed to rest, not to talk to Latvia.

"We thought you were asleep," Estonia said, looking at Latvia sternly.

"Well, I'm not. I couldn't sleep, and now I certainly can't because the light is on."

"Would you like me to turn it off?" His voice was calm, but Latvia could see the panic flittering behind Estonia's glasses. It was Estonia's fault Lithuania had been punished, and reading helped distract from the guilt.

"Well, I can't sleep," Latvia knew he was whining.

"Lithuania's not complaining." That might be the closest Estonia would get to begging _him._

"That's cause Lithuania's perfect," Latvia muttered. He rolled on his side, angry and ashamed. Louder, he said, "Leave the light on Estonia, I don't care."

He could feel Estonia stare at him, probably wanting to ask if he was okay, but Estonia didn't. After a few seconds, Latvia heard a page turn. That stung.

All was quiet except for the turning of the pages, and Lithuania's pained breaths. Latvia felt guilt settle in his stomach. More of Russia's words flooded his mind. " _My poor Litvuska, always getting into trouble because of you, Latvia. And what do you do? Nothing, you never try to make it up to him."_

It wasn't his fault this time, that Lithuania was in bed, exhausted but in too much pain to sleep. _But that doesn't mean I can't comfort him,_ Latvia told himself. He sat back up and leaned across Estonia to rub Lithuania's hair, or maybe a shoulder. Something painless but comforting to let him know he was loved and not taken for granted.

Instead, the opposite happened. Latvia's fingers had settled on Lithuania's head, and the brunette panicked. "NO!" Lithuania snarled, voice fierce and frightened. Blindly, Lithuania struck out, punching Latvia in the nose. Shocked, Latvia recoiled against the wall, cradling his nose. Lithuania had fallen out of bed, looking around wildly, like a tormented animal.

"Latvia! What the hell is wrong with you?" Estonia cried. "He's just been hurt! Do you want Mr. Russia to come down here?"

"I, I, I was just trying to help," Latvia whimpered. He was crying, pain and fear all mingled in one uncomfortable ball in his heart.

"Well, don't."

Lithuania sat panting on the floor, trying to get his bearings.

"L-Lithy?"

The sound of his name whimpered anxiously by his youngest brother grounded him.

"Latti," he said, struggling to stand up. "Oh my god, I hurt you." Lithuania stared at his hands in horror, trembling. "Latti, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, oh god, oh god, what have I done?" He looked at Latvia, more apologies spilling from his lips. The babbling went on for nearly half a minute before Estonia snapped, "Lithuania shut up!"

Lithuania's mouth shut with an audible clank. Estonia reached out to him, but thought better of it and pulled back his hand. "Would you go get Latvia some ice or something, and maybe…try to calm down? It wasn't your fault, you know." Estonia dragged his hands through his hair, not meeting Lithuania's eyes. Lithuania nodded, silently, and looked mournfully at Latvia. _I am sorry,_ he mouthed, then turned around and limped out.

"You don't have to be so mean to him!" Latvia hissed. "He is not your and Mr. Russia's personal punching bag."

"Don't you put me on the same level as Mr. Russia. I am _nothing_ like him."

"Really? Cause you didn't ask me if the light would keep me up, you yelled at Lithuania for no reason, and sent him off to go do chores even though he's hurt." Latvia sat back and crossed his arms, looking at Estonia triumphantly.

"First off, not everything is about _you._ Sometimes, bad things happen, and you just need to do something to get your mind off it."

"Yeah. Sometimes, people make stupid mistakes, get their older brother beaten, and then want to keep everyone up to read. Oh, and this person doesn't even show remorse. He just sits there and isn't affected at all. He's the real ice nation, not Mr. Russia."

Estonia narrowed his eyes, sticking a finger in Latvia's face. "It may have been my mistake this time," Estonia said, voice low, "but far often than not, he gets a pipe to his back or the whip because. Of. You. You, his useless cry baby of a brother. And maybe you don't keep us awake because of reading, but you do keep us awake with your crying, which, by the way, just makes Lithuania feel even worse. So, I think we're pretty even."

"I hate you, Estonia!" He grabbed the pillow, whacking Estonia with it. "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"

"Gah!" Estonia swatted at the pillow, blindly, "what has gotten into you?" After getting whacked a few more times, Estonia managed to grab the pillow. Latvia burst into sobs, and curled up, facing away from Estonia.

"Latvia, what's going on?"

Latvia sniffled louder, which hurt his nose. "Latike, talk to me," Estonia coaxed, trying to use the nickname to sooth Latvia. It didn't work.

"I want Lithy."

"Look, Latvia, I'm sorry I yelled at you. That wasn't right of me. I was just very stressed." There was silence. "I'm sorry I yelled at Lithuania. Is that what you're upset about? I'll apologize when he comes back."

Latvia pulled the covers over his head.

"Fine, be that way."

The two sat in silence until Lithuania arrived. "Sorry…it took…me so long," he panted. "Latti, I've got your ice."

"He's pouting," Estonia snapped.

"Is he mad at me? Latti, oh please believe me! I am so, so, so," he trailed off, and Latvia felt to bed shift as Estonia scrambled to Lithuania's side. "Lithuania!" The fear in Estonia's voice made Latvia leap from under the covers. Lithuania was lying limply in Estonia's arms.

"Help me get him into bed."

"It's okay," Lithuania slurred. "I'm…. dizzy."

"You over-exerted yourself. I should have got the ice myself." Estonia said. Latvia glared at Estonia. The middle Baltic cleared his throat. "I'm sorry Lithuania, I shouldn't have snapped at you earlier. You know me and emotions…haha." He gave a nervous chuckle, laying Lithuania belly down on the bed.

"My fault." Lithuania's eyes were glassy, and his voice was distant. "I shouldn't have—I'm sorry, Latti!" Lithuania whimpered, a few tears falling. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry,"

"Lithy, please stop apologizing. It wasn't your fault. I scared you."

"I punched my brother." Lithuania closed his eyes. "I'm a monster."

"Lithy!" Latvia crawled into bed, forcing Lithuania to scoot over. He managed to wiggle under Lithuania's arm, making the eldest turn onto his side. Tucked against Lithuania, Latvia started tracing soothing patterns on his brother's arm with one hand. The other was pressing the ice on his nose. "Everyone accidentally hurts their brothers."

Lithuania buried his face against Latvia's neck. "I'm sorry."

"Remember that time when Mr. Russia was away, that you tried to teach us swing dancing? You were helping Estonia, and I started dancing with the broom, remember?"

"I remember," Estonia chimed in. "He lost control and hit me upside the head."

"Yeah! Or that time everyone went to the Dacha, remember that? We went swimming. We were going to jump off the rocks, but Estonia thought he saw a snake and started flailing like crazy. He bumped into you and made you fall into the poison ivy. You were covered in splotches for days, and looked so funny. Mr. Russia duct tapped oven mitts to your hands."

"I remember," Lithuania said, voice muffled by Latvia.

"See, we laugh about those incidences now. We'll laugh about this one later on too!"

Latvia saw Estonia raise an eyebrow, so he stuck out his tongue. Estonia's frown deepened.

Lithuania grew silent, and Latvia continued tracing circles on his brother's arm. Eventually, the breath on the back of his neck evened out, and he knew Lithuania had finally fallen asleep.

Gingerly, he wiggled out from Lithuania's arm. Lithuania stirred, and muttered something unintelligible. Then he rolled onto his belly and didn't move.

Latvia turned out the lamp and crawled over Lithuania and Estonia, making sure to dig his knee into Estonia's gut. Estonia grunted, but didn't lash out for fear of waking Lithuania.

Latvia snuggled under the quilt, but couldn't fall asleep. Even in the dark, he could feel someone staring at him. With a huff, he rolled over to face Estonia.

"What do you want now?" He whispered.

"To make sure you're okay."

"Why would you care?"

"Why wouldn't I care? Is this still about the light?"

Latvia wanted to slam his head against the wall. Or, maybe, slam Estonia's head, many times. For someone so smart, Estonia could be terribly dense.

"It's not about the light!"

"Shhh. Lower your voice. Now, tell me, what is going on. Did something happen?"

"No, nothing happened, it's just… I'm a burden on you and Lithuania."

"A burden!"

"Shhh!"

"A burden," Estonia hissed more quietly. "Why would you think that?"

"I don't know… I've never been an empire like Lithuania, or smart like you. And I don't invent cool stuff like Ameri…." Estonia slapped his hand over Latvia's mouth.

"You mean, you don't invent cool stuff like some of the other countries in the Soviet Union."

"Yeah, that's what I meant." Now that it was dug out of him, Latvia couldn't stop talking.

"I'm always getting you or Lithuania, but mostly Lithuania into trouble. And Mr. Russia says that you guys do so much for me, but I don't do anything for you guys. You two don't need me. It would be better for you guys if I wasn't here."

"Latike, that's not true. You are very integral to our group."

"Sure," he scoffed.

Estonia grew agitated. "No, it's true. Listen, you have a gift for dealing with people."

"No, that's Lithuania."

"Lithuania works well because he has compassion for people. You are good with people because you don't."

"Gee, thanks. That's exactly what I needed to hear. 'Latvia, not only are you useless and a burden, but you're uncompassionate.' Way to boost my spirits, Est."

"That's not what I mean. Lithuania, he is always working to make sure everyone is happy, everyone is safe, that no-one is mad at him. People like him because he's kind, and he honestly wants what I just mentioned. But you, take just now for instance. You knew exactly what to say to comfort Lithuania. I wouldn't know. When he's upset, normally it's you who calms him down. With me, I don't know what do say. I let him hug me if he needs to, but that's all."

"So, for all your big brains, your words fail, huh?"

"Sure. But you, you comfort people and bring them light, and differently than Lithuania. Lithuania may keep us safe, and try to make us happy, but you are our light. Without you, I think we would have gone insane a long time ago."

Latvia digested this. "I, I guess I never thought about that way before."

"And another thing. Don't listen to Mr. Russia. He knows how to get in your head. He does it to all of us."

"Really? I, I thought it was just me, and that he was telling it how it was."

"No, he tells Lithuania all the time that he is stupid, ugly, and a failure. He compares him to you and me, and highlights us to make Lithuania feel small."

"But that's not true!"

"See," Estonia whispered. His voice was lighter, more relaxed. "If it's not true about Lithuania, then what Mr. Russia says can't be true about you."

"I guess you're right. Hey, I said, I _guess._ But Lithuania, he doesn't believe it does…oh…he does believe it."

"And you're good at reading people."

"What does Mr. Russia say to you? You're so smart that you probably can see right true it."

"Yeah," Estonia gave a forced chuckle. "You're right. Good night Latvia."

"Hey! You just said I was good at reading people. And I can tell you're upset. What does he say about you?"

"Good night Latvia."

"Whatever. Don't tell me. I told you, but that's fine if you don't trust me." He turned back to the wall with a huff –waiting.

"Oh, fine."

Latvia flipped back over.

"Sometimes, Mr. Russia says that I' m…cold and calculating. That I don't have feelings, that I am incapable of caring about my friends and family…my…people." The last words were almost silent, but Latvia heard them crystal clear.

"Est, that's not true at all! You just show you care in a different way. I mean, it's obvious you care for me and Lithuania."

"You think so?"

"Aren't I meant to be good at reading people?"

"I should have never told you that."

Latvia giggled.

"I love you, Estonia. I'm happy that you're my brother. He grabbed Estonia's hand.

"I'm glad you're my brother, too, Latike."

They both yawned at the same time. "'Night Est. I love you."

"Night Latike. Love you too."


End file.
